I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize
