We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
