So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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