For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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