Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
