I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
When did angry sex become our thing?
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
