So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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