i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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