Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
