what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
