Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
