Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
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