I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
