You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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