The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
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