That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
