i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
