good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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