We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
