11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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