It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
