There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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