ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
