haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize