Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
