i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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