We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
