Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Randomize
