And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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