So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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