There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Randomize
