I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize
