This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
