Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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