You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
Randomize
