i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
