Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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