Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Randomize
