Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
Randomize
