I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
Success! We fucked roommates!
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
Randomize
