you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
