all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
He was drunk at Denny's at 5 am saying how Dear John was the worst movie he has ever seen... eyes filled with tears.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
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