Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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