The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
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