hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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