Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
dude. I can hear the air.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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