I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
Randomize
