Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
Randomize
