Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
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