so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
