There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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